Raymond Lam: “Actually sometimes I don’t want to say such vulgar things. You see, I have been very gentle and polite since the beginning of the show.
It’s because you’re too protective of your shitty husband that I said that.

We say that only by cutting the wound open can the pus be drained out, right?
Only by opening the wound can it heal.

You have been wrapping it there, covering the wound, and you said it is healed, it is healed.
Is it really better?
Well, you wouldn’t come to me to ask. “

Girl: “I didn’t talk about reconciliation. I’m just feeling very upset right now and I don’t know what to do, so I’m talking to you.”

Lin Feng: “So what else can we talk about now?
I say something bad about your husband and you start making excuses for him.

I can’t say a word, but you keep gilding your husband’s words.

how,

His body was sanctified?”

Well. . .

Lin Feng: “And sister, I just told you what happened between your husband and her. I almost wrote a pornographic article in front of you. Can you tolerate this?”

Girl: “I know they have happened, but I don’t know what to do now?”

Raymond Lam: “It’s very simple. Just immerse yourself in the scenes I just described and think about them.

It’s like you’re feeling very internalized right now, and you come to me to chat.

It is very likely that your Crystal husband has hooked up with someone else again.

That woman is now lying in your husband’s arms,
With charming eyes and soft body, she lies in your husband’s arms and his heart is broken.

Smell it, wow, it’s more fragrant than my wife, softer than my wife, and more considerate than my wife,

I have long wanted to stop living with that yellow-faced woman. I just love you.

Don’t you dare to think about it?

You have to think about it even if you don’t dare to think about it. When you think about it to the point of despair, you will let go and feel relieved.

Think about it more, and when you realize that you can’t bear it anymore, then you will really stop. “

. . . . .

On the barrage.

“Wow, the military advisor’s mouth is full of poison.”

“What a sin (laughing to death).”

“What do you know? This is called detoxification therapy (dog head)!”

“A military advisor is someone who can persuade others (sunglasses).”

“It’s a pornographic article. I’ve already written about Big Brother (Sunglasses).”

Hahahaha.

. . . . .

Girl: “But Military Advisor, I have two children now.”

Lin Feng: “Don’t say that, don’t say it’s for the children.

I just said before I connected with you, parents are parents, children are children,

It was obvious that I was weak and didn’t have the confidence and courage to leave.

Now he is using the children as an excuse.

What children need is to grow up in a healthy family, not a family with parents without love.

Anyway, I have told you everything that should and shouldn’t be told.
As for how you want to live your life?

I don’t care.”

Girl: “Actually, I discussed it with him, and he said that in the future…”

stop!
Lin Feng interrupted by knocking on the blackboard: “What do you mean by discussion? This is not something to be discussed, can you understand?

To put it another way, this is called giving you another chance.

younger sister,

You are too humble in your marriage.

Really

I can’t help you with your life.”

Girl: “Actually, I have thought about divorce, but I am not financially strong.”

Lin Feng frowned and said, “Sister, in this era, everyone says they have no ability. You can make 6,000 to 7,000 yuan a month delivering food. Don’t make excuses for yourself.

Your laziness will cost you.
You expect a man to support you for your whole life, which seems to be a right you enjoy after marriage, but in fact it is a detour.

It is better to rely on yourself than on others. No one can be your life saver. “

Girl: “But I haven’t thought about divorce yet. I don’t know if I can…”

Raymond Lam: “So I said you don’t deserve happiness. With your attitude, you don’t deserve happiness.
My words may sound a little cold, or even a little cold-blooded.

But sister, let me tell you, in this situation, if I don’t speak to you seriously, you won’t realize the problem at all.

You are still trying to compromise and hope that this man will return to you for the sake of your family or children.

I tell you,

impossible.

Even if he comes back to you, he definitely doesn’t love you.

Because you are too humble, you have no charm.

Even if he doesn’t divorce you, it just means: in the future, you will be a slave in this family for at least 50 years.

You are destined to be a victim in marriage.”

Girl: “Oh! That’s why being in love is so scary.”

Lin Feng: “Sister, you are not in love, you are just lacking in knowledge, you are stupid.

You don’t understand what a principled mistake is.

To take a step back in a relationship, because I love you, I can accept some of your small mistakes.

But after we get back together, you have to do a lot of things to make me feel safe and you have to respect me.

Rather than just acknowledging it and then doing nothing.

younger sister,

You are not his slave, nor his reproductive machine,
Did your parents make you suffer so much after you got married?”

The girl was silent for a while and then said, “Then I need to tell my parents about this first.”

Lin Feng shook his head and sighed, “You are already an adult and a mother of two children, but your life seems to never belong to you.

I can’t persuade your sister.
Many tragic marriages are like this.
Talking about divorce is too costly, and talking about feelings seems like a joke, so in the end everyone just became a fake couple.

At the same time, they cannot resist the temptation. They continue to put up with it for the sake of life, the opinions of their families, the opinions of their relatives and friends, and because the cost of divorce is too high.
Oh, never mind.

This is your life and your destiny, you decide for yourself.”

After Lin Feng finished speaking, he kicked the girl off the microphone.

. . . . . .

On the barrage.

“I’m convinced!”

“I can’t wake up from my love brain.”

“This isn’t love-brained, this is being brainless.”

“In the words of a military advisor, if a person has no bottom line and can forgive anything, then everything he endures is what he deserves.”

. . . . . .

Lin Feng took a puff of cigarette to calm himself down.

Then he said to the live broadcast room:

“Many people may have a question: if life is already like this, why can’t we just get divorced?
Every family has its own scriptures that are difficult to recite.

Some people are free and easy, some are relatively independent, and divorce is fine.

But for some people, it may be difficult to leave because of their financial ability or a sense of dependence.

The child is a hindrance, and the original family disagrees.

Under all kinds of pressure, many marriages are actually inseparable.

Why did I stop trying to persuade her when she said she wanted to go home and ask her parents?
Because sometimes it’s not so easy to go back to your parents’ home.

In real life, you will find that especially after a daughter is married, if you are an only child, your parents may still love and care for you. But if you have brothers and sisters, your parents will match you up and let you endure and make do.

I will tell you, oh, many men are like this, their children are already grown up, they would rather destroy a temple than break up a marriage,

They will kick you out.

Because he will think you are eating free meals at home,
It’s okay if you stay for a day or two, but if you stay for a week or a few months, you will find that they are going to kick you out.

Therefore, once divorced, many women will find themselves in a tragic situation where they have no home in their husband’s family and are not allowed to return to their parents’ home.

so,

Brothers, you must remember this.
Only when you are financially independent can you have a strong soul.

This is a bloody lesson and truth! “

. . . . .

On the barrage.

“Only by being financially independent can one’s soul stand tall”

“The military advisor is sober in the world, knows the warmth and coldness of human nature, and understands the cruelty of society!”

“Really? My mom said you belong to someone else, why did you bring your household registration back? (crying)”

“Even though I’m financially independent, my parents’ family is no longer the same family. They forced me to get married, saying that if I wasn’t happy, I could get a divorce.

Now they are forcing me to leave just as hard as before. If they really force me to death one day, they will be happy. (Tears)”

“My mother thinks her reputation is more important than my life (grin).”

“I don’t have a home in my husband’s family, and my parents’ family won’t let me go back. I’m really crying.”

“A daughter who is married off is like water spilled (dog’s head).”

“Dividing the family property is like spilled water, but providing for the elderly means that both sons and daughters are equal (sunglasses).”

real!

. . . . . .

Raymond Lam: “I have a serious question to discuss with you guys through this microphone.

Why do people make mistakes?

And make the same mistakes over and over again.

That’s because there’s no price to pay for making a mistake.

When a person has to pay the price for his mistakes, he will weigh the pros and cons.

What to weigh?
Weigh what I will gain and what I will lose by doing this.
If I have more to lose than to gain, then I won’t do it.

So I always say in the live broadcast room that once a principled mistake occurs in a relationship,
You must let the other party know the price.

Here,
Let me emphasize again,
If one party makes a principled mistake during your relationship, don’t give them a chance, just pass them by.

Because you don’t have to gamble.

Why would you gamble your whole life?
But if you are already married, you can give it a chance.
But there must be rules and regulations as a constraint.

As for marriage, there is nothing you can do. No one wants to go to the final step of marriage, right brothers?

Then you have to see if it can be repaired. If it still doesn’t work after the repair, then you can leave.

But if there are principled mistakes during the relationship, I personally suggest breaking up immediately.

There is no need to gamble your future and tomorrow.

Once you get married and have children, your whole life will be invested.

Many people would think, why? Who doesn’t make mistakes?
That’s the price of your mistake.

When you make a principled mistake, why don’t you think about the situation you might face?

So you have to take responsibility.

If there is no price to pay for doing wrong, then everyone in this world will do wrong.”

. . . . . .

On the barrage.

“If you discover it before marriage, it will be treated as a happy event (dog head).”

“Well, I’m getting married. Luckily we’ve only been together for a few months (pen refill).”

“I realized it too late. I’m married now, my child is three years old, and every night I’m consumed with internal energy, pain, and struggle (I cry to death).”

“As a practical matter, it is better to leave regrets in a relationship than to leave hidden dangers in a marriage.”

“Smart people, wisdom (thumbs-up).”

“I used to think love was simple. If you liked me and I liked you, we could be together. But now I find it’s very difficult. Everyone is weighing the pros and cons and testing each other.”

Yes, it’s too complicated.

. . . . . .

Raymond Lam: “Some sisters always say, I actually want to divorce, but for the sake of the children, I can’t bear it.

Some people say that once a divorce occurs, the children will be without a father and will no longer have a complete family.

To these friends,
I would like to ask, what does it mean that a child has no father?
I must correct me, only when the child’s father dies, the child is said to be fatherless.

You are just divorced, but the child’s father is still the child’s father. This is a blood relationship that can never be severed.

Only the child’s father doesn’t live with his mother anymore.

Fundamentally, you have misunderstood the definition of divorce.

Divorce means you are left without a husband, not your children are left without a father. You must make this clear.

Just because you’re divorced, who says that the man’s contact time with his children must be reduced?

Who says that the man must reduce his care for the children in all aspects?
On the contrary, after a divorce, both parties often take better care of and love their children more out of guilt towards them.

It’s just that you don’t want to and don’t dare to divorce. Don’t use the children as a shield.

What children need is two real parents, not a fake couple.”

. . . . . .

On the barrage.

“Divorce means you lose your husband” and “It’s not that your child loses his father”

“It was like an epiphany, a sudden enlightenment.”

Cow batch!

“Bullshit, how many families have been ruined by your chicken soup for the soul? I was originally hesitating whether to divorce or not, but now that you say that, I’m sure I’ll divorce. But do you know how much trauma a divorce will cause to the children?

Even if both parties give love to their children after the divorce, who will make up for the damage they suffered?
The child doesn’t belong to anyone’s home. He will feel most comfortable at his grandparents’ home.”

“Instead of letting your child grow up in an unhappy family, it is better to pay more attention to your child after the divorce. I think your child would rather you divorce than have you nagging him every day. It is because of you that I did not suffer as much psychological trauma as divorcing your father.”

“Haha, there weren’t many divorces in the past, they were all getting along, and I didn’t see any bad children, didn’t they all grow up? But now the divorce rate is so high.”

“When you say grown up, do you mean still alive? Have you ever really cared about your child’s psychology? Have you ever asked your child what he thinks? Is it possible that he also wants you to divorce?”

“That’s how I grew up. I’m cold, selfish, and don’t value family affection…”

“Toxic chicken soup, reported.”

Attached

[Military advisor’s comments: Unhealthy family relationships.]

If the child identifies with the mother’s anger towards the father,
Then the child will try to intervene in his parents’ marriage, such as hoping that his parents will divorce or helping his mother to blame his father.

But if the child sees that his father is also suffering,

He’ll feel guilty.
You will be tortured back and forth like this.

When he grows up, he won’t know how to behave himself in other interpersonal relationships.

What I want to say is:
Your parents’ hard life has nothing to do with you.

Your parents’ suffering has nothing to do with you.

It has nothing to do with you means that it is not caused by you.

You don’t need to rush to solve these problems, and you don’t need to feel guilty, blame yourself, or hold yourself hostage about these things.

My parents have had a rough life and have suffered a lot, all of which were caused by the countless choices they made.

Don’t just let them say: It’s all for you. 】(End of this chapter)