Jiang Tingyan’s eyes instantly turned red, and tears rolled rapidly in his eyes, like a long-accumulated mountain torrent, which would burst the dam with a slight touch. He swallowed his saliva in vain, his Adam’s apple seemed like an old gear that had been severely rusted by the years. Every roll was extremely difficult, and he made a subtle and sluggish “Gedeng” sound, trying to bring a little moisture to his dry throat that seemed to be repeatedly polished by sandpaper. But when the words came to his lips, they were still just broken and messy syllables, and he couldn’t piece together a complete sentence of comfort. He suddenly stretched out his arms and gently embraced Lin Wanyi in his arms. His arms instantly turned into the strongest fortress, tightly hugging her, and his hands patted her back again and again. Every time he patted, he was filled with deep pity and helplessness. His knuckles turned slightly white due to excessive force, just like a dead branch hit hard by frost and snow in winter, revealing powerlessness and vicissitudes. His body couldn’t help but tremble slightly. The sudden bad news was like a heavy hammer, mercilessly smashing into his heart full of longings and expectations. The fear and sorrow were like a surging undercurrent, instantly dragging him into the bottomless vortex of despair, pressing his chest so hard that it heaved violently. He gasped for breath, but still felt as if the air around him had been sucked out and he was about to suffocate.

Outside the car window, lead-gray clouds weighed heavily on the sky, as if they would collapse in the next second. The streets that were usually bustling and lively seemed to have lost their souls at this moment, leaving only a dead silence. The shop signs swayed in the cold wind, making creaking sounds, each of which seemed like a sad song played by fate. The leaves of the trees on the roadside drooped and were lifeless, and the former green and freshness were swallowed up by the haze. On the way home from the hospital, the car was so quiet that you could hear a pin drop. The two were silent, and only the heavy and suppressed breathing of each other intertwined in this small and cramped space. The street scene outside the car window was receding like a slide, but it seemed to be covered by a layer of gray gauze, losing its once vivid and lively colors. The bustling shops and lush trees that could easily bring joy to people on weekdays were now reduced to dull and bleak scenery, like a series of soulless ink paintings, leaving only desolation and loneliness. Jiang Tingyan held the steering wheel tightly with both hands like pliers, his knuckles turned white due to the force, and the protruding joints seemed to crush the steering wheel alive. Lin Wanyi stared blankly out the window, her eyes were as empty as a deep dry well, without any ripples, and seemed to hide endless sorrow.

When I got home, the sky was getting darker and dark clouds were rolling, as if they were going to completely bury this world. The cold wind whistled across the yard, making the wind chimes at the door make a messy and sad sound. The sound was particularly harsh and heartbreaking in the silent atmosphere. As soon as the door opened, Lin Yuelin and Lin Ruize flew over like two cheerful little birds, their little faces flushed, their eyes full of expectation, and they asked in unison: “Mom, how are my brother and sister?” Lin Wanyi met the children’s innocent and eager eyes, and her lips trembled instantly, like the last fallen leaf shivering in the autumn wind, fragile and helpless, tears burst out of her eyes, flowing freely on her pale cheeks. She hastily turned her head away, raised her hand and wiped her face in panic, her movements full of embarrassment and escape, like a wounded animal, hurriedly hid in the bedroom, and slammed the door shut. The sound was particularly abrupt in the silent room, shaking people’s hearts, as if only by completely isolating herself could she tear open a small hole for venting this surging sadness. Jiang Tingyan forced a smile at the corner of his mouth, but that smile was uglier than crying. His facial muscles were as stiff as a lifeless puppet. He raised his hand to touch the children’s heads, his fingertips were trembling slightly, like the fallen leaves in the wind, erratic, and his voice was hoarse like sandpaper rubbing against the rough wall: “Brother and sister have to wait a little longer, go play first.” After speaking, he tried to blink his red eyes to hold back the tears that were about to flow out. The sour feeling pierced straight into his heart, stirring up bitterness.

At night, the ink was as dark as thick ink, pouring heavily into the bedroom. Not a ray of light could penetrate. The darkness seemed to become real, swallowing up all hope. The cold wind outside the window howled like a demon, slapping the window violently, as if the wronged souls were crying about the injustice of the world. Lin Wanyi lay on the bed, staring at the ceiling with empty eyes, tears silently sliding down, soaking a large area of ​​the pillow, the tear stains spread in the darkness, like desperate flowers blooming. Jiang Tingyan lay beside him, also tossing and turning, unable to fall asleep, every time he tossed and turned, he was filled with worries. In the darkness, he relied on his memory and feeling to grope and hold Lin Wanyi’s hand, and squeezed it gently. The hand was so cold that it made people tremble, as if it was a piece of cold jade just taken out of an ice cellar. He frowned in shock and quickly moved closer to her, saying softly: “Wanyi, I know you are uncomfortable, and so am I.” As he spoke, he gently stroked her cheek with his other hand, and his rough fingertips carefully smoothed her messy hair. His movements were so gentle that it seemed like he was touching the most fragile treasure in the world. “But we still have each other, Yuelin and Ruize, we will definitely make it through. Even if the sky falls now, our family can hold together and hold up this sky again.” Lin Wanyi slowly turned around. She turned her head and looked at the vague outline of Jiang Tingyan, her body shaking with sobs. She raised her hand and grabbed Jiang Tingyan’s arm, her nails unconsciously digging into his flesh, and said in a crying voice: “How can I not feel sad? I look forward to him growing up every day, and hope that our family will be more lively… Now it’s all gone, my heart is empty, like a piece of it has been dug out.” Jiang Tingyan gasped in pain, but hugged her tighter, and his hot tears dripped onto the pillow. At this moment, sadness was like a surging tide, completely drowning the two of them. The road ahead was hidden in the depths of darkness. Every step they took seemed to drain all the strength of their body. It was heavy and confusing, without a glimmer of hope.

In the following days, the house seemed to be shrouded in an indispellable haze, so thick that it seemed to squeeze out water, and every inch of the air was filled with depression and sadness. The rain outside the window kept falling, hitting the glass, winding and sliding down the window frame, as if God was also silently crying, grieving for this broken expectation. Lin Wanyi completely shut herself off, not eating or drinking, and the whole person seemed to have been drained of life. She just curled up quietly in bed, ignoring everything in the outside world. Jiang Tingyan saw it with his own eyes and was anxious in his heart. He tried to persuade her several times, but Lin Wanyi just stared at him blankly, her eyes full of grief, emptiness and silence, which made his words choke on his lips, and his full of care turned into a helpless sigh. In desperation, he could only contact the doctor and make an appointment for the abortion. Every word he said sounded heavy and difficult, as if it was carrying a heavy weight. After hanging up the phone, he slowly squatted against the wall, holding his head with both hands, feeling powerless, as if all support had been taken away, letting despair swallow him up bit by bit. The sound of rain hitting the window seemed like a silent mockery of him at this moment, hitting his fragile nerves again and again.

On the day of the operation, the morning light was dim, but there was no warmth. The lead-gray clouds weighed heavily over the city, like an invisible mountain, making it hard to breathe. The cold wind carried fine raindrops, whipping the glass wantonly, and every drop of rain was like a ruthless whip of fate. Jiang Tingyan got up early. The warm yellow light in the kitchen seemed particularly lonely in the dimness. The small halo, struggling in the darkness, was just like their faint hope at the moment. He was busy in the kitchen, and the sound of pots and bowls colliding was cautious. Every sound was like a heavy sigh in the silence, telling of his anxiety. After making a simple breakfast, he walked into the bedroom and gently woke up Lin Wanyi. Lin Wanyi opened her eyes and looked at the familiar ceiling. She was stunned for a long time before she came back to her senses. Her eyes were full of resistance and fear. Her lips trembled slightly. She wanted to say something, but she was silent after all. The words that had not been spoken were strangled by fear. Jiang Tingyan silently helped her up, and helped her get dressed and wash. The two of them were silent the whole time. There was only the sound of running water from the faucet, which sounded like sobbing, adding a bit of desolation to the sad atmosphere.

Arriving at the hospital, the pungent smell of disinfectant made people dizzy. The strong smell went straight into the nose, as if to soak all the internal organs. People came and went in the corridor, and the noise, footsteps, and conversations intertwined together, but made Lin Wanyi feel extremely lonely, as if she was on a deserted island, surrounded by endless cold sea water, and the chill penetrated her bones. While waiting, she sat on the cold chair, her body couldn’t help trembling slightly, like a fallen leaf in the autumn wind, which would drift away at any time. Seeing this, Jiang Tingyan quickly took off his coat, gently put it on her, and held her hand tightly, trying to pass on some warmth, but the chill seemed to come from the depths of the soul and could not be dispelled. From time to time, pregnant women walked by, with their bellies bulging high, their faces full of expectation, and laughter scattered in the corridor. Every laugh was like a sharp needle, piercing Lin Wanyi’s heart. Lin Wanyi glanced at it and tears started to flow again. Jiang Tingyan held her in his arms with heartache, using his chest to block the painful images. He whispered in her ear: “Don’t look at it, I’m here.” At this time, the rain outside the window was getting heavier, crackling on the glass, as if to vent all the sadness in the world. There was chaos between heaven and earth.

Before entering the operating room, Lin Wanyi grabbed the corner of Jiang Tingyan’s clothes tightly, her voice trembling: “Tingyan, I’m afraid…” Her face was already as pale as paper due to the torment of the past few days, and there were dark circles under her eyes, as if they were stained with ink. Her lips were bloodless and cracked. She was so thin that she was unrecognizable. The loose clothes hung on her body, making her look increasingly weak and helpless, as if a gust of wind could blow her down. Jiang Tingyan’s eyes were red. He raised his hand and gently smoothed her hair, tucked a few messy strands of hair behind her ears, and kissed her forehead with a soothing warmth: “Wanyi, I’m outside, waiting for you.” The doctor next to him looked worried, took two steps forward, gently put his hand on Lin Wanyi’s wrist, frowned slightly and took her pulse, and said solemnly but gently: “Don’t worry too much, family members, this is just a minor operation, but she is too weak now, her qi and blood are seriously depleted, and her mental state is also poor. She needs to be more attentive to recover after the operation. After returning home, you should eat a light diet, and the front Try to stay in bed for a few days, don’t touch cold water, and don’t eat raw, cold or spicy food. If there is excessive bleeding, such as more than twice the usual menstrual volume, the blood color is abnormally bright red, or the abdominal pain is unbearable, the pain is so severe that you break out in cold sweat and shiver all over, come to the hospital immediately, don’t delay. “Lin Wanyi listened, tears became more and more violent, and her body trembled slightly. Jiang Tingyan nodded vigorously, remembering the doctor’s words firmly in his heart, his eyes never moved away from Lin Wanyi, full of worry and pity, wishing to bear all the pain for her at this moment. The door slowly closed, Jiang Tingyan seemed to have his spine pulled out, slumped in the chair, his hands interlocked, his knuckles turned white, and he kept praying that time would pass quickly, and he kept muttering: “It must be safe, it must be safe…” Every minute of the operation was torture for him. He pricked up his ears to listen to the subtle movements inside, his heart was in a ball, and every subtle sound made his heart beat faster suddenly, as if the worst result would come in the next second. The rain outside the window is still raging, and the gloomy sky seems to swallow up the entire world, leaving only endless darkness and unknown.

After an unknown amount of time, the door opened and Lin Wanyi was pushed out. Her face was as pale as paper, her lips were bloodless, and she was as weak as a feather. Under the pale light, she looked even more fragile, as if she would break if touched lightly. Jiang Tingyan rushed over, held her cold hand, and cried, “Wanyi, it’s okay, it’s all over.” Lin Wanyi opened her eyes slightly, her eyes were empty and tired, and when she saw Jiang Tingyan, tears silently fell. Jiang Tingyan hurriedly wiped her tears with his thumb, and leaned close to her ear and said, “Let’s go home, everything will slowly get better.”

After returning home, the rain gradually stopped, but the house was still filled with lingering coldness and silence, and the air seemed to have frozen into ice. Lin Wanyi went straight back to the bedroom and lay down, as if everything in the outside world had nothing to do with her. Jiang Tingyan was guarding the bed, worrying about how to take care of her, when Lin Yuelin and Lin Ruize came back from school. In the evening after the rain, the sky was still gloomy, and the damp air came in through the cracks in the door, bringing a hint of coolness. As soon as the two little guys entered the house, they noticed the low pressure in the house. They sensibly lightened their footsteps, looked at each other, and walked into the kitchen with understanding. Lin Yuelin took her brother and sneaked into the kitchen, learning to cook noodles like before. This time, Lin Yuelin cooked more carefully and even added a poached egg. After cooking, she carefully served it in a bowl and whispered to her brother: “Brother, we will definitely make Mom happy this time.” (End of this chapter)