Chapter 153 [Extra] Gu Changnian
To this day, Gu Changnian still can’t help wondering what the situation would be like now if he could do it all over again.

In the great war three years ago, immortals and demons formed a temporary alliance and made sealing the demon god their common goal. The black veil covering the northern border suddenly disappeared, the miasma left by the demon god dissipated completely overnight, and the water in the Sanzu River returned to calm.

It’s just the devil, no more news.

Yue Qingru and his two companions who returned from Sanzu River said that they saw the tide recede with their own eyes, but they did not see the devil.

That demon god seemed to be just like her, leaving no trace at all.

It seemed that the chaos had been settled, and even the relationship between immortals and demons was much better than before. The only one who was severely hit seemed to be Beifeng.

That person is no longer with us. The already deserted Yaoguang Sect became even colder like an ice cellar after only he and Yue Qingru were left. It seemed as if not a single ray of sunlight could penetrate.

Occasionally, he would dream about her, but he never dreamed of her.

Those dreams, like a replay of past and present lives, let him see what would have happened to him if she hadn’t appeared.

He broke through the realm of cultivation, won the championship, obtained two swords, successfully killed his master, and sealed the demon god…

In the dream, Gu Changnian was successful in everything he did. Everything seemed to be going smoothly and as it should be, as if every step was following a pre-planned route.

But he just felt strange, as if he had seen someone else’s life, and it had nothing to do with his own.

If possible, he would rather dream about that person and start over with her in his dream.

This time, he would never thrust that sword again. He would tell her: I believe this is all a misunderstanding. I know you have no ill intentions, so don’t keep your distance from me, don’t be wary of me, just the two of us, live a good life in the misty North Peak…

But he still hadn’t dreamed of her.

……

In the battle in the north, he was seriously injured. Even after recovering, he was left with an irreversible disease, making it impossible for him to ascend to heaven.

But it doesn’t matter to him anymore.

His daily ascetic practice in seclusion was not as diligent as the other immortal masters said, but for the purpose of self-torture, so that he could fall into endless and irreparable pain.

His time seemed to have stopped after her death, and every day and night had no meaning in his eyes.

He regretted it so much. How could he understand his own feelings only after losing that person? How could he not realize that she and his master were two completely different people.

How could he ignore those obsessions and entanglements that were clear proof of his admiration for her?

But, I just realized it at the last moment…

She came from another world, and when she first arrived, the first person to see her was obviously him, but he did not know her, did not understand her, and did not even give her a chance to express his true feelings, so he became the first person to send her away.

She had taken the initiative to show her affection to him and had given them opportunities to get along better, but he had not seized them.

Maybe, it really is God’s will.

She replaced the master who gave him nightmares, but also made it impossible for him to enter her heart forever.

Yue Qingru has always been carefree. After coming back and being dejected for a few days, he became as playful as usual again.

In this world, the only two junior sisters who miss the same person as him cannot feel his loneliness and desolation.

So apart from practicing with Yue Qingru regularly, he didn’t even want to see Yue Qingru.

No, if you think about it carefully, it’s not that there is no one who can feel what he feels.

Chi Yu has always known him very well.

Over the years, Chi Yu often came to visit him, but he always refused to see her.

“Go back, and don’t come to see me again.”

Chi Yu outside the door said hesitantly: “If this is what you want, then I won’t come again.” “Chi Yu,” Hearing the footsteps, he couldn’t help but blurt out his apology: “I’m sorry.”

Chi Yu said: “There is no right or wrong in this kind of thing, it all comes from the heart.”

Chi Yu has always understood him very well, and she may have discovered his feelings earlier than he did.

If he shared his loneliness and the love he could no longer express to that person with Chi Yu, she would definitely be able to empathize with him.

But he couldn’t do that, it was too mean…

He couldn’t delay Chi Yu any longer…

■

Two years later, Yue Qingru had become a cultivator who could stand on her own, but in Lingshan, she was still only close to Chen Yue and Yun Chu, and every time they went down the mountain, the three of them were inseparable.

And every time he came back from the mountain, Yue Qingru was obviously in a good mood, but he couldn’t understand why he could be so happy.

For him, happiness seemed to be something he had experienced in his previous life.

“Brother?” Yue Qingru was holding a pile of Dharma books in his hands and a brush in his mouth, and he asked vaguely, “Why are you willing to go out today?”

He said, “I will go to Master’s room and sit for a while.”

Yue Qingru’s face wrinkled immediately, and he looked like he was hesitating and worried about something. Then he put down the book of Dharma and came over to persuade him, “Brother, Master has been gone for five years. Don’t be sad anymore.”

Gu Changnian pulled the corners of his lips, as if he was smiling, but his dim eyes were filled with endless sadness: “Okay.”

Yue Qingru was about to say something but stopped herself from saying it. She said stiffly, “If Master were still alive, he would definitely not want you to torture yourself like this.”

Gu Changnian smiled self-deprecatingly: “If she were still here…why would she care how I torture myself…” Then he went towards the man’s former residence.

“Brother!” Yue Qingru called him but didn’t speak immediately. After hesitating for a long time, he said as if he had made up his mind: “This time when I went down the mountain, I met someone who looked very similar to Master.”

“Really?” Gu Changnian paused for a moment and replied casually, “That’s great.”

What’s the point of looking like her? No matter how much she looks like her, she won’t be her…

Turning around the corridor, Qi Guanrui came towards me.

Qi Guanrui’s eyes were filled with sorrow and longing. The two of them obviously didn’t look alike at all, but for some reason, Gu Changnian felt like he was looking in a mirror.

In the past few years, Qi Guanrui, who was practicing in Tianshu Gate, often came to the peach tree on the North Peak to commemorate that person, but Gu Changnian rarely saw him.

There seemed to be some kind of unique tacit understanding between the two of them. Neither of them was willing to meet the other, who was in almost the same situation as themselves. It was as if as long as they spoke to each other, the wounds in their hearts that had not yet healed would be torn open again and bleed.

Same this time.

The two looked at each other, then lowered their eyes and passed each other.

When he reached the end of the corridor, he heard Yue Qingru greeting Qi Guanrui——

“Second Master, you are here again?”

“Well, come sit for a while.”

“Well, actually, Second Young Master, Master has been gone for five years. You…”

“I know, I’m just sitting for a while.”

Gu Changnian slowly closed his eyes and relaxed his stiff shoulders: There is still one person in this world who, like him, is obsessed with that person. This is already good enough…

There is also a sweet extra chapter, don’t panic!
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(End of this chapter)